#3 The Big Fat Food Wagon Wedding
This is a multi-edition short story series about a teenage boy who works for a food truck that traverses New Jersey summer after summer. Ryan is a 17 year old who works for Food Wagon LLC, a traveling food truck run by Eli, a 40 year old entrepreneur.
The summer season all coalesced on one night in August. Eli had been preparing for this evening for months, really years if you consider the notice given to him. Eli confessed this was the biggest wedding he had ever done, “She invited everybody, her hair dresser, everybody.”, he would say. The event was a wedding held for a longtime friend of Eli’s, Geralyn. They had known each other for 15+ years and all of Eli’s friends love his cooking, love his personality, and always ask for him to cater their parties. You see, Eli thus doesn’t get to “go” to many weddings, he is usually sweating in a truck in the corner. This wedding, as was said, was different, Eli had been stockpiling ingredients for weeks. Geralyn chose not just a lot of menu items, but the most expensive and tedious to make. Where did Eli keep all of this stuff? He had a freezer in his garage, his family’s freezer in his house, and a dead body storage type freezer in his basement. The night before the big event, Eli and Ryan were avoiding “Sasquatch” in Northwest Jersey, it was a late night, and the two were to have another late night on this day. Eli had previously asked everyone to invite as many extra people as possible, this was going to be all hands on deck. Eli would need servers, cooks, dishwashers, platter makers, we are talking about a lot of people, more than his usual orbiting crew. Ryan invited his cousin Rylee since the wedding was going to be closer to his house in South NJ, close to Cape May actually. The day began pretty slowly for Ryan, Eli was two hours late picking him up, Ryan would get these chaotic phone calls of Eli telling him they were on their way with people yelling and arguing in the background. There were certain deadlines that had to be met, they needed to be on the road soon to set up, which takes time, and then be ready to serve at 6:30 that night. It was already close to 12. Eli pulled up in front, Ryan came out.
“Hey, Ryan, how are you doing? We have to pick Smokie up and then we have to get this hose figured out.”
“Hose?” Ryan thought, “What is he talking about?”
“Ok, sounds good.” He told Eli.
Ryan often, if you haven’t already noticed, responded with an: “Ok, sounds good”, when he did not know what was going on. They got to Smokie’s and he took 20 minutes to come out with his hat and tea. Home Depot was down the road, so they went there.
“I have this hose, a gas line for the fryer, it is busted, I need a new one, but the connector has to be 1 and ¼ inch. I hope they have that there.” Eli told Smokie.
“1 and 1/4 , oh, they should have that, Home Depot has everything.” Smokie advised.
Eli said a few things to himself, he often thought out loud. “Should I put two fryers on the truck? Are we going to get slammed with fries?”
They entered the parking lot and Eli led the way, speed walking to the front doors. Home Depot was fairly busy, the store was stacked with hardware and building materials and signage directing customers was everywhere. The team burned down the aisles looking for the gas connectors, scanning boxes/displays, searching for the right fit. Eli holding the ratty, greasy old tube, comparing it to the various fittings.
“Should I get another one of these?” Eli was looking at the tubes, he pulled a pack off the shelf and moved back to the connectors.
“Look for the 1 ¼ inch ones.” Eli told Ryan.
“Ok, I am not seeing them.” Ryan picked through boxes.
Eli pulled an associate to the side and asked for her advice. Eli is easy at getting caught up in conversation. Eli likes to learn and hear from others, so that turns into 30 minute long conversations in Smokie’s garage where they talk about whatever and Ryan stands there staring at the back and forth. So this time Eli got the part he needed but also spent 10 minutes talking to the lady about the industry and how to get the gas lines working for the fryer. After that, the group rushed the self-checkout, but Eli forgot something as they were paying so the rest of the crew had to hold the counter till he came back. Eli did, after a few awkward minutes where people were staring at the group for taking up space. They exited the store with their goodies and made an attempt to leave, BUT, Eli realized he left the nasty old tube in the middle of the connector aisle and went back into the store to grab it. Now, they could leave, BUT, just kidding, they actually left this time.
“Alright, we will go to my house and get all of the stuff packed into my car and then we are going to have to leave quick.” Eli said, referring to the dozens of containers of meats, appetizers, cooking equipment, etc. that were sitting around his property.
“Ryan, I think I will have you go down with Jenna, and Smokie and Tip (another employee) and I will drive down in the GMC and meet you all there.” Eli explained.
“That sounds good.” All Ryan was worried about was getting his cousin to the event. Rylee was supposed to be picked up by Jenna, then it was Vern and then it was Jenna and Vern and then Jenna again. So, Rylee was very much left without much instruction other than to be at a parking lot by a certain time window.
The crew headed South to Eli’s Pine Beach home, when they got to the front of the house, Ryan’s eyes very much expanded in surprise at the sight of people running around the property and multiple cars parked out front. The scene was easy to get lost in. The group left the car and immediately saw Eli send off the 4 guys (some of whom Eli had never met before) to man the trailer left in scary farm house land up North. Then, following that, Vern came out of the already open front door with containers of fruit and told Scott everything that had happened while he was gone while she put the things in the back of her Acura.
“Ryan, can you go in the house and see if the short rib is ready and put it in the back of Jenna’s car.” Eli quickly instructed Ryan who was kind of watching the hurricane of commotion circle round him.
“Is it in the kitchen? You said the back of her car?” Ryan had never been in Eli’s house before and he had a thing about walking into random houses.
“Yeah, Jenna will help you.” Eli shot back.
Ryan proceeded to the front door and was intercepted by Vern who handed him a container of cottage cheese to put in her car, he did so and then made another attempt at the door, this time making it in. The enclosed porch had hardwood floors and nicely painted walls, childrens toys were brushed to the side. The living room, which came next, had tiny road stickers on the floor for little Matchbox or Hotwheels cars. Play sets lined the walls, furniture in the center of the room. Ryan tried to shrink himself, head down, shoulders slouched, Tip passed with a few more containers stacked in his arms. The dining room fit the same description as the rest of the house, then there was the kitchen. Two women were working there, doing last minute finishing touches on some foods, it was Jenna and her college friend. The windows facing the driveway were open and you could see a hustling Eli carrying bags of french fries and containers of burners, his eyes darting and feet avoiding any tripping hazards, Smokie passed following him, carrying the same stuff. Back in the house, Ryan approached the counter where a metal tray held slabs of cooked meat.
Searching for the food, “Um”, Ryan just asked; “Is this the short rib?” He touched the tray, ooo, still hot, “Smart move dopey”, he thought.
“Yes, you just have to bag it up.” Jenna said.
“Yes, ok.” Ryan responded.
He got his hands on some Ziplocks and some tongs and then weirdly finagled the tender, warm meat into the bags. As he was doing that, Ryan began to look around the room, out the window was Smokie with a cigarette in his mouth (he looked like he was imitating a cigar), lifting boxes, Eli was behind him moving stuff in his garage so he could walk. The kitchen had another table, counters on two walls, and a sizable fridge. Jenna was on the phone with someone, her friend was playing around with the oven, and Ryan was messing with the short rib. Ryan wrapped up the charade and put the bags in a clean metal tray, he asked if that was all the short rib and got a “yes”. Turning around, he charted his path outside the house and to the parked HR-V Jenna would drive down to Cape May in.
“Hey, Ryan, can you help me with this fryer?” Eli yelled from the other end of the driveway.
Eli had decided to bring an extra fryer down.
“Yes, I will be right there.” Ryan responded.
Ryan walked up to a mumbling Eli who was staring at the machine.
“Should I clean this thing? Do I have time to clean this thing? Ugh” Eli said to himself.
Eli walked away and went to get some Brillo pads and the garden hose. Ryan kind of just stared and looked around at the rest of the commotion, Smokie stacking boxes of breads, Tip moving cheeses around, Jenna, Vern, and her friend yelling in the house. Ryan assumed Eli did not need him anymore so he walked over to Smokie and asked what he could do.
“Go get the onions from the fridge in the garage.” Smokie commanded.
“The fridge in the garage?”
“Yes, the fridge in the garage”
“Where in the garage?” Ryan looked down the driveway, first he saw a frazzled Eli scrubbing and hosing the fryer, the metal was white with suds and the water was pouring down the sides, Eli was talking to himself and waving the hose back and forth. Past that scene, there was a white tent with a transmission under it, then some stone piled, then the garage door open with the place full, except a small passage on the left side.
“On the left, in the front,” Smokie told him.
“Thanks.” Ryan embarked on his journey, passing the “Hosing of the Fryer” scene and the tent of auto parts, there was a cast iron hand railing Eli planned on reshaping like a blacksmith someday, car batteries, a sandbox and lawn behind the house, then the garage, Christmas decorations were loose in the front, bikes were inside and a transmission lift appeared in the background, containers and tool chests filled the floor, on the left a white, humming refrigerator. Ryan opened the door and most of it was empty except for bags of mushrooms and onions.
“Eli, do you want me to take the mushrooms too?”
“We have mushrooms in there? Take them.” Eli turned back to the soapy fryer.
Ryan took a stack of the bags out and carried them back to the cars, Smokie pointed him towards Vern’s car. In Vern’s trunk, Ryan saw boxes of white bread and fresh baked rolls filling most of the space. Vern brought out blankets to cushion the bread and insulate the frozen goods. Ryan placed his bags down and went back to get the last two, returning to place them in their blanky.
“Take these containers somebody, please.” Vern was yelling from the front door.
Ryan walked up and grabbed the items and went to the car and saw Smokie rearranging a few things, Smokie liked to do that a lot.
“Maybe we should take all this bread out and move it…” Smokie was cut off.
“No, I think if we just carefully separate the rest of the stuff we are good” Tip jumped in to save the crew from a 20 minute reconstruction of Vern’s trunk.
“Alright, we got to get moving, we got to hustle down there.” Eli came over to the guys. “Somebody help me with lifting this fryer.” Eli had finished his cleaning and the equipment was in the driveway, all shined up.
Smokie and Eli lifted the fryer and Tip and Ryan moved a few things out of the way in the GMC. Random stuff, pieces of wood, a propane tank, plastic packaging for car parts, a “How to rewire….” book. The two men came over huffing and puffing as they carried the fryer to the lip of the trunk and slid it in, it fit just so perfectly as to not cause a meltdown crisis because the fryer was going to be left behind (Yay!).
“Ok, I will get…. And grab…...And tell them inside we are going....And get….” Eli walked away talking.
The women inside and Eli could be heard talking through an open window. Ryan got his things together, still not knowing how he was to end up in Cape May. Tip and Smokie were also standing ready. Eli came hustling out of the house.
“Ok, let’s go, Ryan you can sit in the back with Tip, just keep the metal trays between you two”
“Yes.” Ryan answered.
The group got in the car and rolled off. Eli’s GMC was chugging along. The car headed North on Rt. 9 and towards South Toms River.
“Oh, I forgot the cream cheese, the cream cheese!” Eli blurted out.
“The cream cheese.” Tip repeated in the second row.
“Should I go back? I also need half and half. Can I get these at a gas station?” Eli questioned all of this outloud.
“I don’t know man.” Tip said.
“Can you call them (the people at the house) and ask them to bring it?” Smokie suggested.
Ryan was going through the memories he had of the many times the crew forgot ingredients.
“There is a Wawa up the road, should I stop.” Eli was serious about this.
“Sure,” Tip said.
Eli ended up bypassing it and deciding to wait.
“There are plenty of gas stations down there.” Tip assured Eli, who was wondering if he was making a mistake.
On the southbound lanes of the Parkway, the group soon forgot about the cream cheese and half and half woes. Eli, Tip, and Smokie were having their own discussion and Ryan split time between listening and looking out the window.
“You know dolphins……..” Smokie went on with one of his more unpleasant scientific discovery stories that entertained Eli and Tip.
Smokie was good at telling odd, strange tales, interesting, but different from the average story. Eli and Smokie would bounce absurd ideas off each other’s head about what a toll booth operator was doing or what TV show is the best. Wait…toll booth operator you ask? Eli did not have an E-ZPass for his car, so he had to stop at every toll booth and pay the rate in change. It only added a couple minutes to trips, but you could tell Eli did not enjoy it that much. Although, the operators were pseudo friends to Eli, they would talk music real quick, or about what the job was like, as the toll fee and change were being passed back and forth. So, on this wedding excursion, Eli made his fair share of stops and small talk.
As they headed South on the GSP, the lanes went from three to two and the exit numbers kept declining. Ryan was wondering what Rylee’s fortunes were in these moments, Did he get picked up? Is he sitting in an empty parking lot? Is he there already? They reached their exit, the venue was closer to Sea Isle than Cape May. On a country road the crew turned into a small farm’s driveway, sizable pot holes filled with water forced the GMC to go on carefully. A staff member directed the car to a place to traverse the lawns and, in the sight of their eyes, lie the food truck, plucked from the beaches of Manasquan and plopped right next to the swamp. The GMC parked parallel to it on the grass. Everyone hopped out into the humid air and soggy grass, it had rained the night before. Eli unlocked the door to the truck and went in, everyone else began passing food through the ordering window and through the door. Eli messed around with a few things inside. Ryan tip-toed around puddles and soggy mossy parts to get the food where it needed to be. Eli came and began to help. A man associated with the farm walked up and talked to Eli, he told Eli he had to move the GMC, it was ruining the lawn. Eli negotiated a settlement in which the crew quickly removed the remaining food stuffs and he would go park the car elsewhere. The man allowed it.
“He wants me to move the car.” Eli told everyone.
“Why?” Ryan asked.
“He said we are messing up the lawn.” Eli answered.
Ryan looked behind Eli at the grass. Puddles, dead spots, color variations, tread marks, what a BEAUTIFUL set of greenery they had here.
“This lawns looks like crap as it is.” Ryan said with a laugh.
“Yes it does, but I will just move.” Eli had a smile on.
Smokie and Tip appeared, carrying a foldable table. The table looked beat up and dirty.
“Put it here, ok hold on, here” Smokie was directing his other half to a good landing spot. “Good, right here.” The legs were unfolded and the vintage faux wood foldable was set-up.
“Ryan, come help me with the next one.” Smokie looked at Ryan, who was carrying some cheese.
“Yeah, I will come.” Ryan put the cheese through the window, Tip went inside the truck. Smokie and Ryan rounded the sizable one-story barn the truck was parked next to. Avoiding getting his shoes wet, Ryan walked against the building. The other side had more puddles, overgrown weeds, and amongst the weeds, a couple tables. Some of the tables were in disrepair, beginning to warp.
“Grab this one” Smokie told him
“This one?” Ryan put his hands on it, it was damp and slippery.
The two heaved up the table into their arms, and began walking. Ryan almost twisted his ankle in the various watery holes in the ground. Smokie paid no attention to his path, he just chugged it over to the side of the truck.
“Set it down here, wait no here, no here” Smokie the Perfectionist kept dragging his end around, Ryan shuffled his along.
The metal legs were rusty and squeaked as they were sprung out, temporarily getting stuck. The property manager stood about 100 feet away, with a smirk on his face, his pride and joy furniture were being used. Looking around, the venue was pretty cool, there was a bigger barn with activities set up inside. The open field had a tent placed on it with white chairs and tables placed out and a plastic dance floor layed down. The pond looked nice once you got past the swamp before it. “Geralyn should have a good time”, Ryan thought to himself. The crew was getting into the hang of it now, things were moving, ingredients were being put away, Eli was doing his thing. Ryan was unboxing breads when he turned around and was startled by someone he did not recognize. He focused his eyes and realized, “It was Rylee!!!”.
“Look who it is!” Ryan said with a growing smile, this was really happening.
“Yeah.” Rylee had a smirk on his face, he was looking to place the load of trays he was carrying down somewhere.
Ryan shuffled a spot clear on the counter, but so did Tip behind him, so Jake placed the stuff there.
“There is more stuff in the car” Rylee left the truck. Ryan followed him to Jenna’s car parked on the other side of the weed/puddle situation. Back and forth, back and forth, the crew went and carted food through the mud. Ryan tried to tiptoe around the water, but his attempts were useless. Shoes wet and all, he noticed some of the wedding party had started to arrive. Ryan and Eli both knew most of the people attending the wedding. Ryan’s Aunt was a bridesmaid and many of the others were close friends of hers Ryan grew up around. So with cans of salsa or bags of onions Ryan waved to guests he recognized. Including his Aunt Kayla who waved from afar to avoid the sloppy grassy mess. His Uncle Roland was in the background and waved too. Back at the truck, the cooking got underway where it could. Counter space was limited and there were one too many guys on board shuffling around. There was so much food, the fridge and freezer doors barely shut, all of the fresh baked bread was stacked in boxes on the driver's seat and the sauces and condiments lined the countertops. Prep space was divided by 3 guys Smokie, Ryan, and Rylee. Rylee had never done anything like this before and Ryan was trying to give him ideas on what to do, so was Tip and Smokie. Rylee ended up cutting watermelon, which would be offered as an appetizer. Chatter picked up outside the window of the truck, visitors kept coming to see Eli, and Eli tried to converse back as he was crawling on the floor or massaging meats. At this particular time, Tip and Eli were attempting to set up the extra fryer he brought down in his car. The easy part was lifting and placing the equipment, getting it to start running was another issue. Eli was doing his thinking out loud calculations about how best to get the tubing to attach.
“What’s up Uncle Sticky” A 10 year old boy entered the truck and punched Eli in the arm.
“Hey” Eli brought him back out and Ryan looked out the window to see a bunch of children and unfamiliar adults gathering, smiling, and talking to Eli.
Ryan realized they must be family and Eli was now giving them directions. They were his saviors, his culinary helpers. The crowd gathered around the tables that were set-up earlier and Tip left the truck and handed them platters, they were going to do the appetizers. Crackers, Rylee’s melons, cheese slices, etc. were all sent out to them. Rylee ended up going to, becoming an uncomfortable temporary family member. It was actually quite the site, all their little hands so intricately placing the lines of balsamic and sprinkling the feta so finely. Under his breath, Ryan was also laughing, laughing at what the guests from afar were thinking about the group of young children working on their meals. Inside, the older guys were preparing the bigger entrees and some other appetizers. There was short rib, sliders, salmon being cooked now. The kids were helping walk the trays of food around the gathering.
“This is going well so far” Eli said. “Except for this fryer”
Smokie was cooking on the griddle as Eli and Tip haggled with the fryer. You could see Eli was about over the delay, his hat was being jostled by his hand, Tip was listening to him and zoning out. Eli crawled behind the fryer, becoming face-to-face with the pipes. With tight grips, he would attach and detach the gas lines. Then, a loud “Whoosh!” came from that end of the truck.
“Got it!” Eli jumped up nearly slamming his head. “Let’s leave it and let it heat up, we need to drop those fries and sprouts.” Now they were cooking with gas!
Tip laughed, happy they could move on now. Ryan switched from manning the prep work to staring at the warming fryer, his newly assigned duty. To his left was the open back door and woods and swamp and flies, to his right was the scorching griddle with slabs of salmon sizzling and cooking, behind him was an already overfilled sink full of empty containers, elsewhere the crew was cooking and sorting and traying. Ryan had waited long enough, he filled the fry baskets and dropped them down.
“SCHWOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” The oil bubbled up and let out a loud scream, the oil rose and nearly overflowed down the sides of the machine. Ryan stood there, eyes bugged out.
“No!!!!!!” Eli rushed over and lifted the baskets, “It is ok, when they are fresh out of the freezer all of the extra ice activates and bubbles up the oil.”
The screaming settled down and so did Ryan’s heart rate. It took a couple more attempts before the noises would be a little more muffled. Things started rolling again. Big bowls were filled with the delicious fried goods, they were sent out to be put in fancy metal trays with Sternos under them to keep them warm. It was all coming together. Inside on the counter, two trays, one with salmon, one with short rib, were to be the main entree choices.
“Hello everybody!!!” Vern was here!
“Eli, Eli, What do you need from me?!” Vern was ready to work.
“Ummm” Eli was passing chunks of meat into the metal trays behind him.
“I want to help Eli!” Vern was insistent. “I can take orders, I can stand at the windows and take the people’s orders.”
“Yeah, do that. Take orders.” Eli had his answer.
“Ok, I need something to write on, is there a notebook?” Vern was now shuffling things by the window.
“Ummm, yeah, let me look.” Tip cleared his throat and helped her shuffle.
“Somewhere over there, there is something.” Eli was moving the spatulas around.
“I don’t see anything.” Vern was still picking up glove boxes and ketchup bottles.
“You might have to use butcher paper.” Tip said in an open-ended tone.
“Oh” Vern said.
“Yeah, just use the butcher paper!” Eli shouted from the griddle.
Butcher paper is that wide cut, reddish brown heavy paper that wraps cuts of meat. Eli rarely used it for that actually, more often it was an impromptu notebook page. Eli wrote important instructions on butcher paper, he used it as a menu, as an order taking sheet, as a notice, as decoration, butcher paper was a wonder product on Food Wagon.
“Ok” Vern ripped off a good size piece and took out a pen.
They were set, it was game time.
In the distance the actual wedding was taking place, the friends and families were sitting in the white chairs, the priest was at the altar, Charlie (the groom) was standing, waiting for Geralyn. A parade of babies and small children in red wagons was organized and began pacing down the aisle. Geralyn in her dress followed the display. Bridesmaids wiped tears from their eyes as Geralyn passed the last row of chairs and approached Charlie. Both had a shine in their eyes, both had big smiles on their faces. Charlie sang his vows, Geralyn spoke hers, and there was a grand kiss. Ryan was giving a play-by-play of the whole thing as he pretended to be busy at the window, he was happy to see the two wedded after such a long delay.
“They just kissed.” Ryan announced to the crew.
“They are married now? Alright, let’s get to work.” Eli told everyone.
Everyone was smiling.
“Hey, Eli, we are going to go now.” One of Eli’s sisters said.
“Ok, thank you guy so much.” Eli said from the grill.
“No problem Eli.” She walked away with the crowd of kids.
“Bye Uncle Sticky”, “Bye Stick”, “Bye Uncle Stick” Why they called Eli this?, Where did this nickname come from? Ryan did not know.
Appetizers were done. DINNER TIME!!! FOOD WAGON BEAST MODE TIME!!! DINNER FOOD WAGON BEAST MODE TIME!!! As the crowd rose from their ceremony seats they all, at once, lined up 100 people+ deep in front of the truck. Ryan looked up at this and was taken aback, this was the single greatest line of customers he had ever seen or handled in his Food Wagon career. Things were getting real, one by one, each person was helped.
The way it worked was simple: One hundred person line, table of plates, window where you got salmon or short rib in a roll, table with salad/brussel sprouts/french fries, go sit
How novel!? This went pretty smoothly and every other person knew the crew and had a short conversation. Rylee was back in the truck at this point and was helping with the various moving parts of the whole charade. The constant movements of the meats and breads was extraordinary.
“Can I take a proof of life picture of my nephews please?” Aunt Kayla and Uncle Roland were at the window now.
“A what?” Vern said.
“A picture of Ryan for my sister.” Kayla said back.
“Oh, yeah, a picture, sure.” Vern smiled.
Ryan took a shot.
“I used to work on the truck with Eli.” Kayla told Vern.
“Oh yeah, Tammy, right.”
Laughing: “No, Kayla, you don’t remember me?” She felt awkward.
“Oh, yeah Kayla, I remember you Sweetie.” Vern laughed and Kayla laughed.
Ryan passed them their orders and they went away to the Sides Table where Rylee found himself making Truffle Fries (A Food Wagon Delicacy of French Fry/Truffle Mushroom Oil/Grated Parmesan). Most of the guests were super nice, super patient, super hungry, although some were super mean.
“Hi, I would like to order my entree” A man with a thick New York accent stood at the ordering window, a woman at his side.
“Samon or short rib?” Vern asked.
“Samon or short rib, huh? What else do you got?”
“We do not have anything else, it is just salmon or short rib on a roll.” Vern affirmed.
“Huh, well, do you have anything else?” On his heels, he raised his head to peer left and right into the truck.
“No, just salmon and short rib sandwiches”
“Well, I am looking for a real dinner.”
“Salmon and short rib are a good meal, we are a food truck.”
“Ah, what am I saying, sorry sweetie, I am Italian, I speak my mind” The man tried to touch Vern and had an insincere smile on his face. Ryan gave him a death stare and wondered if he should pop off on this guy, but decided against it.
“I am Italian too, do you want anything?” Vern dismissed his gesture.
“No, I am good.” He turned around and shook his head as he walked past the Sides Table. Vern and Ryan looked at eachother.
“What was that?” She asked.
“I don’t know.” Ryan shook his head.
The line was depleting, clean up began on Food Wagon. Everyone was happy with how they did. The crew got to enjoy the partay now, and eat, because they did not eat, and they were hungry. So, partay had to wait like 20 minutes till everyone had a bite. In a weird social circle Ryan, Rylee, Tip, and Smokie discussed cars, school, work. Smokie had a cigarette going and both him and Tip had grabbed a cup of beer from the bartender. Aunt Kayla and Uncle Roland came from the tent, where you could hear the DJ call out those good dancers.
“Let’s go, Roland wants to leave soon.” Kayla said.
“Really?” Ryan asked just to be annoying.
“Yes, are you ready to go?” Kayla said successfully annoyed. For the record, Roland was smiling behind her.
“I have to tell Eli we are leaving.” Ryan got up and walked around looking for him.
Clean-up was underway, and Ryan noticed that the food was being thrown out, perfectly good short rib was being lost to the can. A light bulb went on in Ryan’s head; “If it is being thrown out, then why can I not take some of this gorgeous creation home?” What happened next was typical Ryan in Free Stuff mode, in all he filled four jumbo Ziploc bags with short rib and four jumbo Ziploc bags with rolls. Ryan was so proud of this feat, he almost had a tear go down his cheek.
“Hey guys, we are taking a picture in the photo booth if you want to go” Eli came out of the dark and then disappeared again.
“Do you want to go to the photo booth?” Ryan asked Rylee.
“Sure” Rylee said.
Off the two went , eventually intercepting with Kayla and Roland who they asked to do a picture with.
“Yes, and then we have to go.” Kayla said with a serious voice.
Everyone gathered at the booth, first Ryan, Rylee, Kayla, and Roland took pics, then the Food Wagon Crew, stuffed into the booth: Vern, Eli, Smokie, Tip, Rylee, and Ryan. You see, Ryan missed the part that they were making silly faces in all of the pics, so instead in every picture he had the same happy smile.
“Eli, me and Rylee are going.” Ryan said.
“Oh, ok.” Eli said. “Oh, I have to pay you. We will go back to the truck.”
Before they went Rylee went up to Ryan, holding a copy of their picture; “Should I show this to a random person at one of the tables.”
“Yes, do it.” Ryan loved Rylee’s spontaneous pranks.
“Ok.” Rylee meshed with the crowd and Ryan watched him approach a couple at one of the tables. He could not hear, but he saw a smirking Rylee talking to a nodding man.
Rylee came back laughing; “I told him ‘Do you see my picture?’ and he said ‘Oh yeah.’ and then I showed the woman and she went ‘Very nice.’”
“That’s great!” Ryan was losing it.
They made their way back to the truck where Eli gave them some monies and Ryan grabbed his bags of meats and breads.
“Bye Eli, thank you, have a good night.”
“Bye guy, thank you, thanks again Rylee for doing this.” Eli smiled and waved.
They met up with Kayla and Roland and headed for the parking lot. Now, the venue was so fancy, they had golf cart rides to the parking lot. So they got a lift, it was dark, the driver was very animated and interesting at 9:30 at night. As the group talked to each other, the driver would chime in in a weirdly happy voice. Ryan was suspicious, he had recently binged NCIS, and, if you are a fan of the show, you would know that each episode starts with an off story about how the victim was murdered. This moment felt like that to Ryan. They entered the parking area, but could not find the car. Instead the driver drove past a parked car with an interior light on.
“Hmmm, that’s weird, the light is on in their car.” Driver Man said out loud.
“Yeah, that is.” Kayla said.
The cart stopped, the hairs on Ryan’s neck stood up. As the driver walked away Ryan leaned over to Uncle Roland and whispered into his ear; “This is where we die”. Roland laughed. Ryan was thinking about his options as he saw the driver walk the sides of the sedan and look in the driver’s and passenger’s doors. “Do we just run now? If we don’t, can we fight this guy off till we run into the dark?” The driver walked back “Please don’t, please don’t, please don’t”, Ryan hoped for the best.
“That was weird, the light was on in their car” Driver Man sat down.
“Yeah, so weird.” Kayla said.
They drove back to the venue, the driver left , came back, and left, and came back again. Circling back around again, the group asked to just be let off in the parking lot and they would just find the car. It took a couple of minutes, but success!. They got in and took off to the hotel everyone was staying at. Kayla and Roland were checking out at 10 PM. The hotel was a historic building, very ornate, very well decorated, and filled with small, but efficient spaces. Ryan and Rylee were loosened up at this point and goofing around, Aunt Kayla tried to limit this, but it was an unsuccessful endeavor. On the porch, Rylee stopped at windows to the dining room and made faces behind the people sitting in front of the window and hopped around the porch.
“Rylee, stop.”
“HAHAHAHAHAHA” Rylee was alive.
“HAHAHAHAHAHA” Ryan was loving this.
“You guys need to stop” Kayla was defeated.
Kayla and Roland’s room was beautiful, carved wood elements, hardwood floors, and a clean, modernized bathroom. Rylee is a wannabe hacker and will take your phone or mess with your TV, this time he figured out how to get into Netflix and play random movies on the room television. Someone never logged out of their account and Rylee took advantage of that loophole.
“What a nice bathroom!” Ryan yelled, he was exploring the space. “Oh look, you guys did not use the free soaps and lotions?”
“No, we left them for you.” Kayla said sarcastically, Roland could be heard laughing.
“Yeah, take them.” he said.
“Oh, really,” Ryan pocketed those soaps and lotions.
Leaving the bathroom, Ryan saw Austin Powers on the TV, and walked around the room.
“What a nice pen!” Ryan pocketed the pen.
“Alright, let’s go before you take anything else.” Kayla said.
The group walked out, and down the stairs, Rylee made a turn towards the dining room, but got a stern no from Kayla. Outside they passed the windows again.
“If you mess with those people again, I am going to have to kill you.” Kayla was over it. Both boys laughed, but complied.
Now they were bringing Rylee to his Galloway home a few miles north on the Parkway. Kayla and Roland were tired, but Rylee and Ryan were still good for some fun. This included a marathon discussion at 11 o’clock with Rylee’s dad at their house about how the day went while the others waited in the car to go. Kayla wanted to be home ASAP, so they stopped at a Wawa, makes sense. They got weird junk food and Ryan got a milkshake, a solid dessert. Happy, they sat mostly quietly the rest of the ride home, it was a crazy fun day for Ryan and he was taking it all in, with each sip of the shake.
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